How do you understand the expression: What got you here, will not get you there?
For me, another way of saying it is: what got your current level of success (in work or relationships) will hold you back from your next level of success. Especially if what you want is fulfillment.
That is because our first levels of success in life result from what we have learned as coping skills from childhood’s challenges and disappointments. These ways of thinking and behaving (or coping skills) come from an experience that caused us to contract, not expand. They are usually survival, scarcity and fear-based.
They can help us reach a certain level of success, but they will not take us to thrive and feel fulfilled. Instead, those beliefs and behaviors will keep us in certain patterns that feel safe and/or familiar, even if it is hurtful!
For example, some people learn to succeed in a work environment with relative ease. They feel safe being bold and taking chances at work, and they keep putting energy into that area of strength to the cost of health and relationships. And, on the other hand, other people are good in relationships but struggle to develop their careers.
When we are successful in one area, we cannot really understand why we are unsuccessful in another. Likewise, we don’t understand what is not working because we cannot see our deeper patterns. Or, sometimes, we may have an idea of what needs to change, but we don’t know how to change it effectively.
This challenge is natural because it can be very uncomfortable and hard to look at our (survival) patterns and change them – especially alone.
If you feel stuck and want to move towards more fulfilling work, relationships and life, let’s talk! I can help you become more aware of what is holding you back and help you move to your next level while feeling understood, supported and cared for.
Request an appointment at www.iriasebastiao.com
