1 – You’re confused.
You feel like “you did all the right things” or “you’ve got everything,” but something is still missing out. You may feel like you “should” be happy, but you don’t feel that way.
2 – You are questioning your beliefs and values.
You are doubting yourself and past choices. You are not sure what you know and what you believe anymore. You are not sure about who you are, or who you want to become next.
3 – You feel overwhelmingly stuck, or “lost.”
There is an urge to change. But you are not sure what you want to change, or how you want to change anything. But, you want a change.
4 – You don’t want to care about others now.
You are not a bad person. But, right now, you just don’t care. You don’t feel like engaging in social or daily activities. You would rather stay still in your bubble.
The dark night of the soul (or existential crisis) is a process of growth and expansion that we all experience in different phases of life. It can be experienced as a “soul call,” or as a need to live life with deeper purpose and meaning.
(Note: It can be mixed up with depression and anxiety and, in some cases, it is recommended to consult with a primary care physician.)
Why does the dark night of the soul tend to be prevalent in your 40s?
In the 40s, it is when you start to reflect about what you want in your next stage of life with more depth and maturity (hopefully). You have accomplished some important milestones, which can be related to career, family, financial and/or social status. You know better what you like, and what you don’t like. You also start caring less about meeting others’ expectations or what they think. Therefore, you are better able to ask deeper questions about the status quo and your own values.
All those elements can lead to a deep reflection, which can move towards significant changes for the next phase of life. This process can have exhilarating and liberating moments of freeing oneself from beliefs and other unnecessary heavy burdens that holds one back from being more authentic. But, it also can have very dark and confusing moments. That happens especially when one needs to let go of beliefs and other structures that have served well or have been part of one’s sense of identity.
If you are going through this process and don’t want to feel so lost and alone, request an appointment at www.iriasebastiao.com. Allow me show how I can support you through this process and help you be ready for your new beginning, with more clarity, confidence and trust.
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