(VULNERABILITY ALERT!)
This article is about “coming out of my professional closet.” Recently, I received an intuitive guidance to change how to present myself professionally. It may not sound like a big deal, but it has to do with utilizing a title to which I have been resisting for a long time. I am choosing to share about this process because we all struggle to come out of our closets at different times.
I refer to “coming out of the closet” as the process of showing up more authentically about an aspect of our life or personality that we believe we need to hide, usually because we are afraid of being judged or punished.
One personal aspect that I don’t freely talk about, especially in a professional setting, is my connection with intuition and spirituality. Partially because I found a way around it, and greatly because I am afraid of being misjudged, invalidated and dismissed. So, I use my credentials as a licensed psychotherapist with the language of emotions, behaviors and neuroscience to deliver messages that come from my intuition. So far, it has worked well, but it does not feel authentic to me.
I confess that the psychotherapist title makes me feel safer as it is more accepted or validated in society than other titles such as life coach or intuitive healer. But, at the same time, this title is making me feel broken because I feel I am hiding an important aspect of how I operate in life and in my work.
In different phases of life, for different reasons, I have been a client of psychotherapists, life coaches and all sorts of intuitive healers. I see value in all of these modalities as they still serve me well. Also, I have had training and certifications to present myself as a psychotherapist, coach and/or intuitive healer.
My connection with spirituality and healers come from a very early age. My mother says that I used to “play with invisible friends” at the corner of the room, giggling and laughing with the wall. She believed I was playing with my Guardian Angel and that was fine for her. 
Also, my parents believe that I was saved by an intuitive healer when I was a 2-year-old toddler. They had spent everything they could to consult with various doctors who could not help me. They were afraid I was going to die because I was refusing to eat for weeks for no identifiable reason. I was bone and skin and the doctors could not agree on a diagnosis or treatment. My parents took me to a certain healer and after the visit, and some illogical or “magical” unfoldments which included drinking holy water, my health recovered. As I grew up, my family visited all sorts of healers for healing, blessings and energy tune ups. In their waiting rooms, I heard about all sorts of miracles and healing on physical and emotional health. As a child, that felt just like a normal experience, it was not extraordinary as most people see it.
I don’t claim or feel that I perform miracles. As a client and as a provider of different modalities of personal development and healing, I know that what makes a difference to support clients is not the title, nor the amount of credentials and certifications. What mainly makes a difference is the connection and trust between the client and the provider.
Even though the title is not what delivers the healing and transformation for a client, for presentation and marketing purposes, I need one. Whichever title I pick, it feels like I am choosing one piece of myself to put on display and hiding other parts in the shadows. There is no title or label that can possibly encompass our complexity and ways of being. Whether it refers to profession, gender, sexual identity, religion, political opinion and so on. As a human being we all have more nuances and complexities than our language and labels can describe.
Each of us is a kaleidoscope of experiences, gifts and challenges. We are aiming towards light, moving in our cycles while creating something beautiful along the way. Each person is a beautiful, rich and multidimensional expression of being. So am I, so are you.
At this moment, I am “coming out” and presenting myself as a Spiritual Coach & Catalyst for Personal Change. It feels that it encompasses better what I bring through my work, which is facilitating my clients’ connection with something deeper. In this process, help them create a movement towards what their heart truly wants, while bringing a sense of expansion, harmony and joy.
How about you?
- Are there experiences that you keep in hiding because you are afraid of being judged or punished?
- Do you also hide certain qualities behind credentials so you can feel safer?
- Would you like to expand how you express yourself?
- Is there any aspect of yourself that has been a challenge to expose more openly?
In any case, there is no obligation for anyone to “come out of a closet,” nor “to stay in a closet”. Either path is an expression of being that holds its own beauty and challenges.
Whichever path you are on, be kind to yourself!
Iria Sebastiao, Spiritual Coach & Catalyst for Personal Change
